When Comparing Yourself to Others…

A sweet friend asked me…

What do I do when I feel like judging other peoples’ successes in life while things are not going so well for me?


I feel this is a question many of us are asking at this time and hence I wanted to share this answer.

When things are not going as well as we want them to, we often tend to look at other people’s successful lives and envy the ease of their progress. We do not realize that they too have gone through their ups and downs — in fact none of us are immune to the disorderliness of things.

Every person experiences disorder at different times in their lives.  The real difference between you, when you are going through discord at this time, and those whom you “envy” for their success, is just timing.

“Our minds tend to see only what is in front of us — the mind cannot see the bigger picture.”

We can only perceive a minuscule part of the person’s life, but we cannot see the entire 360 degrees of his or her life experiences throughout time and space.

Thus, it is not right for us to come to a conclusion that other people “always” have successful lives, when we have no idea about their past or their future life experiences.

“It is important to remember that everything in life has its timings/seasons.”

After every sunset there is sure to be a sunrise, after every Winter there is sure to be a Spring, after every phase of sorrow there is sure to be joy and excitement.

It is wise to be very conscious of the flow of life, to be in the place of trust and patience and to accept things as they are, for nothing is permanent.

When we take courage to face our fears, a kind of sanity arises within us and helps us move forward with balance.

Every moment is a grand success when we are able to see the gift every moment brings, for every down moment creates a seeking and reveals wisdom, and every up moment creates gratitude and balance.

Every moment is precious if we choose to face it without judgment, and every moment we are present, we harvest immense wisdom for ourselves and for this Planet.

May we choose to be alert and awake to every situation that life benevolently brings our way!

Premlatha Rajkumar




Twelve Steps to Inner Peace

Get comfy & cuddle up with her book:
“Twelve Steps to Inner Peace”

Available on Amazon:
Kindle edition  —  Paperback edition
Audio edition

Copyright © 2012 P Rajkumar, S L Christian
All rights reserved


Read more by Premlatha Rajkumar
Ask Premlatha a Burning Question!
Follow Premlatha on Facebook
Follow Premlatha on Twitter

5 thoughts on “When Comparing Yourself to Others…”

  1. Sage advice, dear Premlatha. <3 You've captured the essence of the fallacy of comparison and its relationship to judgment which can only come from the personality-mind-ego construct, which in its need to survive, will create all sorts of lies and beliefs that narrow our natural experience of joy and obscure the power of the heart which comes judgment free. Consciousness encompasses EVERYTHING and has no need for identification of any kind. A good 'trick' to dealing with a feeling of lack when it pops up is to not identify with it by first of all realizing that it IS a lie and expressing the opposite, in as many ways we can until we've practiced this enough to change the lie and belief in lack to let our truth and heart shine through. Pretty simple, but it works!

  2. A very efficient way to get to a place of not feeling good is to compare what we are feeling on the ‘inside’ to what we are seeing ‘others’ display on the ‘outside!’ The mind has a lot to say about this and in my experience, it’s usually not helpful! When we observe this happening, we can simply make another choice. Thank you dearest Premlatha! Great message! <3

Leave a Reply